What do procrastination, money and cupcakes have in common?
For one of my clients, everything! (And of course there is a universal theme here so it is worth mention.)
Procrastination has a purpose. This purpose is very important and often unconscious to those struggling with it. What is most interesting though about this, is that I have found that when we go through it- the unconscious cause is often something that truly baffles us when we uncover it. In other words, it doesn’t seem logical that something so emotional or irrelevant can be causing massive procrastination to the person going through it.
Here’s how it looked for my client “M”. She was suddenly finding herself not able to resist cupcakes.
For this particular client recently it completely stopped the flow of money into her life and created an additional stress: the fear about money. This fear about money was actually just a by-product of the procrastination issue. Let me explain.
She had found food very compelling as she was in a great transition in her life and this was her main concern. When we looked deeper she noticed her stress was around the future and her business. Why had her flow of wealth stopped suddenly and what could she do about it? Here business had been doing just fine before her recent relationship transition and out of nowhere, the “flow” of clients and money just abruptly stopped, which added to the stress she was already feeling in leaving her partner. There was nothing obvious different in her business… it all seemed to be an internal condition causing the problem.
The stress she felt was immense as she navigated a new time in her life separating from her partner and growing her business.
Those little cupcakes were the tip of the iceberg here.
However, the cure was really rather simple though the situation was serious and it would be easy to get lost in overwhelm with the circumstances. But she had the work we were doing and powerful energy transformation tools.
So what did we do?
We didn’t focus on the cupcakes for one. That is not the issue Goddesses. Don’t let yourself get stuck there even though it seems like the most important problem ever! It’s not. Here’s how to figure out what is and shift it.
Ask yourself what happened before the current cravings started. Sometimes this leads back to childhood and sometimes not. This client first became concerned after leaving her husband. No accident there right? This may sound obvious of course, and yet, she was totally unaware of how much stress this was causing and the lack of self worth that was coming up for her- triggering her. It made no sense to her conscious mind, but it had some deeper roots into her past.
So we addressed her emotions around leaving very specifically and her fears about being able to support herself. The energy of fear, doubt, worry or guilt and regret can leave us very stuck and unable to create anything moving forward. Trust me on this one, it isn’t theory. I know this from my own life and from the lives of clients. We think our feelings don’t really matter but they do, and they are creative.
Procrastination serves a very genuine purpose of stopping forward motion, the trick is to find and release unconscious reasons why we don’t feel safe to move forward in some way
When we were able to address and release some of the fear and worry, as well as some guilt over leaving her husband who did not want her to go and seemed helpless without her she was able to address fear of the future.
What we realized when we looked at the fears was actually quite exciting because we could see what she specifically needed to address.
It wasn’t just a fear of the future stopping her in her tracks- it was very specific fears of networking and marketing that she didn’t want to do and that had worked well for her in the past. She knew that if she got out there and got into action in specific ways, that she could make more money but her overwhelm and ambiguous fears about the future had significantly clouded the issue for her.
After we knew the exact things holding her back, we could quickly address those too.
At the end of our session she had booked three different networking events and had NO FEAR of going or connecting whatsoever. These were the exact actions that had produced the biggest results for her in the past and that she had stopped doing.
She also had released her fears and worries, at least for that day and knew she was going to be ok. The only day we have to work with is the one before us, so this was a profound start.
Blessings Goddesses, until next time.